WEDDING & EVENTS
MONTEREY | CARMEL | PEBBLE BEACH

7 Myths about planning a wedding

 7 Myths about Wedding Planning

Okay I am going to say it – The entire wedding industry is surrounded by myths, half truths, and misconceptions. Yes, while planning a wedding you have a ton of important decisions to make and plenty of people offering unsolicited advice. But as a whole, the planning process and the wedding industry receives a bad rap because it is surrounded by myths.  Below are some of the most common myths you might encounter, and why they are just that, myths. 

 

1. It has to be stressful

Absolutely not true! Why should planning for the happiest day of your life be stressful? If anything it should be memorable and fun. Since the average couple spends 400 hours planning their wedding, why not make the most of it? It shouldn’t strain your personal life or cause sleepless nights. How can you turn this chapter in your life into a fun and memorable experience? Simple: hire professional help. 

 

I get it, not everyone has the budget to hire a wedding planner to simply take the whole thing off your plate. The good news is that there are other more affordable options besides full planning! This is why I offer wedding management! (For more on why wedding management is the absolute best value in wedding planning read this post.) I guarantee you that having a wedding pro by your side will put your mind at ease and make the planning process enjoyable, not stressful.

Bride and groom walking hand in hand in green setting

Photo by Ines Zrinski

2. Wedding planners have some secret stash of discounts

Wedding planners can absolutely save you money. However, unlike popular belief it’s not because we get special pricing from vendors or strong arm our partners.  We save you money because we know our industry, our market, and what is worth spending money on. This knowledge and experience translates into accurate pricing for what you actually need on your wedding day. We know what is worth spending money on and what’s not and will be totally honest with you about both. In other words, we make sure no money is wasted. You get the most out of your investment. In fact, I can usually at least offset the cost of my services.  

 

3. Hiring a wedding planner will mean my wedding isn’t personal

How silly! Every couple is different. My job is to work with you to make your day a complete reflection of you as a couple. I am very proud to say that all of my couples and weddings have been unique and personal.

 

4. Second opinions are helpful

Oh my goodness, if I had a nickel for everytime a couple called me feeling emotional or torn because of other people’s opinions, I’d be a rich lady!  When you announce your engagement you may notice that many people see this as an invitation to offer their unsolicited opinions and “helpful” suggestions. Remember this is your wedding, not anyone else’s! The only opinions that should matter are yours and your fiance’s. Find a constructive way to be thankful for the others’ advice and let it go. 

Door and florals marking the entrance to the wedding ceremony

Photo By Brandon Scott

5. Vendor prices are negotiable.

It is natural for couples to ask, “is that vendor price negotiable?” Typically my response is no. Why is there usually no room for negotiation? Because a professional planner should only be working with vendors whose prices are fair and standard for the industry. Think of it this way: when you are at a restaurant would you ask your server for a discount or your doctor? Probably not. More importantly, the wedding industry is huge and offers couples a wide range of choice. If you feel like something is out of budget you can always evaluate your needs. 

Again, part of the reason you hire a planner is for my vast knowledge of the industry, and my ability to save you money. As a planner, I know all the best vendors, all the venues, and I know how to get things done for a reasonable amount. Because of this, my fees are easily offset by what you save in other areas. 

Bartering is also not an acceptable form of payment. I have been asked before by bloggers to plan an event for no cost in return for a blog post about my business. Most reputable and experienced vendors know that the value in this trade is not equitable. So please don’t ask vendors to service your wedding in exchange for something like a blog post. 

 

 

6. “ I can save money by doing it myself/with a friend/family member” 

This is a mistake lots of people make, especially early on. Trust me though, it is a mistake you do not want to make with your wedding day. DIY weddings are tempting, and in theory can save you money. However, remember that your time is also a valuable resource, and one you can’t get back. When you consider everything that goes into a wedding, including your time, money, and energy it is just too much for one person to handle on their own.  DIY projects are great, just not if that project is your wedding! 

 

Another major mistake is thinking that a friend or family member can provide a service on your wedding day. Seriously, 99% of the time that person doesn’t have the knowledge, experience, or ability to do so. It’s not their fault, they aren’t professionals and shouldn’t be put in that situation! There is a major difference between hosting a dinner for 10 people and catering a wedding of even 50 people. Also, just because your friend has a nice camera that does not mean they can handle taking your wedding photos!  You need a pro’s help; it is going to be one of your life’s most monumental days!  

 

Also, think of the pressure this puts on the other person, and how it could strain your relationships. I have seen friendships and families suffer massive rifts after entrusting someone with a job that should be done by a professional. Just keep the day and your relationships positive by hiring a professional! 

 

7. Say the word wedding and all prices instantly increase

Indian wedding tables and linens and florals

Photo by Shannon Cronin

This is just not true. Yes, weddings tend to be more expensive than other social events (for example birthday parties, showers), but there is good reason for this.  The simple truth is that weddings are much more complex and involve a lot more time, planning, energy, supplies than other events. Therefore a wedding tends to be expensive because of all that goes into it, not just because it’s a wedding.

Here are some examples of what I mean: venues are cheaper on weekdays, so things like corporate events that are typically held during the work week get a discount on rental spaces. Also, staying with the corporate event example, they don’t consume near as much food and beverage, and typically don’t require a lot of the services that a wedding would. 

Also, couples are often confused about wedding planner fees, especially when compared to event planners fees. Typically, wedding planner fees are more expensive than an event planner’s fees. Again, it comes down to the immense amount of time, resources and effort involved with planning a wedding. My services for planning a wedding are much more expensive than a social event because my time upfront and on the day of are much less when it comes to a social event. As one easy example, a social event typically lasts for 3-4 hours. On the other hand, a wedding ceremony and reception lasts 6-8 hours, and my total time spent working on site is 12-16 hours. 

 

 

All of the myths and negative opinions about weddings can make planning a wedding much more difficult than it has to be. However, I encourage every couple to really try and educate themselves and separate fact from fiction. I think once you do you will find the wedding world is actually an industry of big hearted people striving to make your big day absolutely perfect!

Photo by Megan Welker

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